faith TMI ttc

Wishful Thinking and Daniel Fasting (TMI allllll the way through this one)

Hello!  I’m hoping all is well with you.  It’s been a few days since I’ve had a chance to write, but i figured I would share a bit of what’s going on in my world.  Earlier this week, I had an interesting episode occur.  And here is where the TMI occurs.  I visited the ladies room at work and discovered there was quite a bit more cervical mucus than usual.  It was of the extra creamy variety (sorry, sorry, I know…TMI).  My cycle was about  8 days or so away and while I am used to a bit of discharge leading up to a cycle, this was so much more than that.
Almost immediately, my body let me know not to get my hopes up.  I started cramping…a lot .  That was even earlier than usual.  So, all this week, my mind and I have been going back and forth over what the cramps could mean.  My side sounds something like this:
could be pregnant.  The cramps could be implantation cramping or uterine cramping or anything related to pregnancy.
My mind eagerly destroys that and speaks things like:
It’s probably pre-menstrual cramping.  The same you get every month.  The same you’ve gotten every month for almost four years.  The discharge?  Yeah, it’s a little more, but you have been inhaling water this week.  Extra moisture, extra release.
Ugh, my subconscious annoys me.  The fact is S. and I are still actively trying without trying to give away to the other that we are hoping that this time is the “it”  time.  We’re in a waiting pattern for when we can try assisted fertility treatments again and so we’re limited to “the old fashioned way”.  That being said, it doesn’t appear to be working.
So, fast forward to today and  I’m sitting here again hoping that the tweaks in my breasts and the cramps on the right side of my abdomen are good news and not another defeat.  In the meantime, I suppose it’s not a bad idea to find out if the fertility diet I read about really works?
Speaking of diets and eating properly, tomorrow is the start of the DanielFast.  Our church family is doing it for the month of February.  I’m very excited about it.  Not because of any of the weight attribution aspects, but because of the opportunity to get a deeper understanding in God.
I’ve been praying about a few things for quite some times.  Still, I am not where I want to be in my walk with Christ and feel like there is more that He would have from me.  When our Pastor announced he would like the church congregants to join him in the Daniel Fast, I was excited.  Maybe the devotion and prayer time is exactly what I need to see where God is going to take me in the upcoming year.
Either way, I think I am looking forward to the journey.  If I get healthier from it, all the better.  If I get a stronger relationship in Christ, better still.
I’ll keep you updated on these symptoms.  

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